Dating and Relationships
- Heegi Kim
- Sep 7, 2022
- 2 min read
Updated: May 17, 2023

BJ Thompson is the director of Build a Better Us, a marriage ministry which he co-founded in 2008. He has been married for 14 years to his wife, Vanja, and they have three children. BJ is also a campus director at Morehouse University in Atlanta for The Navigators, an international Christian outreach ministry.
Passage | Mark 12:30-31
Mark 12:30-31 ESV
[1] And you shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and with all your strength.’ [31] The second is this: ‘You shall love your neighbor as yourself.’ There is no other commandment greater than these.”
Discussion Questions
Note: BJ talks about how God designed relationships. Whether you are single or dating, we are all designed to be in community with others. As you go through these questions, think about the different relationships in your life.
It’s not good for you to be alone because you were made for relationships. We were all made to be in relationship with others, in community. Talk about a time in your life when you felt alone. Healthy relationships are based off of Christ and the church.
God is the one who created relationships. Why do you think we have a hard time bringing Him into them? Is there a relationship that you need to bring God into?
As BJ said, relationships are made of commitment, trust, and intimacy. Relationships only work when we have a mutual consent of these three things. If we give too much, it can lead to heartbreak. Why might we find ourselves giving more intimacy than commitment in relationships? What can we do when we find our relationships are too one-sided?
Different types of love are friendship, family, passion, and God’s love – Which one do you think is easiest? Which are more difficult? How do you find it difficult to have a balance between these types of love?
As BJ talked about Agape, God’s love, he said, “God doesn’t love us based off of a feeling. God loves us based on His decision.” What would it look like to love others with Agape love in our relationships? What might you need to practically change about your mindset of love to do this well?
Pray for each other to develop relationships that honor each other and the Lord. Pray that you would be willing to sacrifice of yourself to love other people well, doing it out of an unconditional love for them and not for your own gain.